9 week 6 day appt

YEAH!!!!! Who would have thunk it after such a rough beginning. I had my 9 week 6 day appt yesterday. Pretty boring and uneventful which is how I like it. First off I got a freebie. NO EXAM. HOORAY!! The nurse came in and went over some stuff and took my bp. Then she said she was going to let my ob know I was there. Um, ok, but I thought I had the exam today. She said nope. I talked with him about that and he thought it was unneccesary. I had one in January and seeing I was seen in the ER at 6 weeks 1 day and they did one then with the cultures. No more was needed. HOORAY HOORAY HOORAY. Ok, I just hate those gyn exams if you kwim. My ob wasn't whistling yesterday so he wasn't in a fab mood. Usually, he is whistling. When he isn't, he is cranky. Anyway, he has no idea why I have all of a sudden developed this severe allergy to shellfish. I am to STAY AWAY from it. It may or may not go away. He is getting my referral extended. Um why does he always ask me what he needs to do for it. I told him I think he needs to give it to the billing clerk and have her extend it. I'll call her at the end of the month after I check and make sure she has done it. I have to stay on top of it with her cause she is lazy. I swear she ALWAYS gives me a problem and I dislike her very much. She is just so RUDE. I gave him a copy of the current referral. So hopefully he will take care of it.

My bps are good for the most part except the other night. The other night was BAD. 97 on the bottom. He said he didn't like that one at all. The others were good. I was a little worried when the nurse didn't have the doppler with her that he wouldn't try. I was like no way am I letting him get away with that! I kind of was relieved when he came in with the doppler and the gel. WHEW. Then he tried. WOW did he go low. I was like ummm hello. We listened. I heard my heartbeat. I heard the blood rushing through the placenta (sounds like wind). I didn't hear the baby. I finally asked will you please get the US machine. I could feel the panic rising. He went and got it. He found the baby right away. Last time he hunted at 8 1/2 weeks. This time he went right to it, but I guess he had help because he located the placenta with the doppler so he knew where to go.

I could hardly breathe because he would lose it for a second when I did. We saw the heartbeat, within like 5 or 10 seconds he said the heartbeat was 141-145. He said that the baby was moving. I even saw it bounce up and down a couple of times. He said it was twitching its legs and arms. I don't know how he could tell that because baby looked like a blob. It really is amazing how much they change week to week. I wish I could get USs every week. He said it was because of the resolution of his machine, it was so old. His machine he said was 15-20 years old. WOW. I said umm time to upgrade doc. He said a refurbished machine like his that was 15-20 years old ran about 20k. A new machine ran 70k. I said well Dr. W's must have been REALLY expensive because she has a huge plasma on the wall across from it. He said that setup ran well over 100k. HOLY CRAP. Ok, no wonder my insurance pays $500 a visit with her after their discount! He watched the baby intently for a few minutes. I was starting to get worried because he has never watched the baby that long before. However, he said everything was ok and perfect. I told my boss about it today. She said he was probably looking that long because I had a previous loss and she said he was probably just checking out the baby's movements and making sure everything was ok. I hope so. I hate this anxiety. I told my ob that the last baby never moved once on US, just had a heartbeat. He said yeah he knew? This one was moving. Hooray.

He said the anxiety is probably a combination of my loss and being on steroids. He said steroids can wreak havoc on your hormones. However, I figured out today it is a combination of getting close to when we lost the last baby, my upcoming due date, and I would have probably been delivering around now. I still don't feel like we will be coming home with a baby and that terrifies me. My ob says it can't get much more perfect. We talked about a doppler for home use but he thought that would cause more anxiety. However, today, I bought one off Ebay and felt an immediate sense of relief. Sorry, but I can't help it. Even though he has told me I can come in for a heartbeat check at any time, I KNOW that I need something that I can check with when I feel the anxiety and panic come on. So I bit the bullet and bought one. I just hope it works!!!

We scheduled my next appt for 8/7 right before my peri appt. He said they would get me in and out quick. I think the nurse told him I was anxiety ridden. I brought my Ipod with me to help calm me down thinking music would help. I don't know, going to my ob used to be YEAH we get to hear the baby. Now all I do is pray pray pray that there is still a heartbeat. I have so little symptoms. I sit there in the waiting room and exam room praying there is still a heartbeat. There was relief when I saw it yesterday on US. Already within an hour of being there, the anxiety hit with full force. I thought today as I was buying the doppler, a hundred bucks is worth EVERY piece of my mind. I also figured that we could use it and listen to it as a family. This will be my last baby if this one sticks. So I said go ahead and spring for it. So I did. I told dh and he was actually excited. It will probably be here in about a week.

That was about it. See you in three weeks. Oh and bp was 120/88. A bit high on the bottom, but nothing to give my ob a stroke about.