FREAKING OUT

YES I AM TOTALLY FREAKING OUT ABOUT THIS LAP. I know I shouldn't but I can't help it. I did not sleep last night at all even with Unisom. I know it's needed. You don't have to tell me. I know he'll fix what is wrong. I also know it will give me a greater chance in TTC. But still I am freaking. I don't want to go up and be on the 4th floor. I don't want my vacation to be spent on recuperating for surgery. It is NOT fair that I have to do this again. I should have gotten more time. I should NOT have had a cyst burst in May. How freaking unfair is it that I still ovulate on the pill???? I guess that gives me some good feeling that I am fertile myrtle. But it is just not fair. I had NO plans of being in my obgyn's office till NEXT year. NOT now. So not fair. I did get a 2 hour nap with S today. But it's just not fair. I know some have it worse. At least I can still have kids. Many who have this can't. Anyway, I just pray that he finds what is wrong and takes care of it. Please keep me in your thoughts......